8 Months!

Well I am officially a terrible blogger! Being a busy mom will do that to you! Most of my freetime (AKA naptime) is spend doing chores, cooking and sewing diapers! 

Our boy is now 8 months old. We have been talking regularly about how "grown up" he seems now. Baby doesn't seem like the right word to describe him anymore, he is a little boy!

He started crawling a few weeks ago! And by crawling I mean doing the worm, but he gets where he needs to go. He is *almost* able to crawl on all fours. Regardless of crawl method, he gets around. He now leaves the fun and safety of his playmat to come join me in the kitchen, play with the dog bowls and eat morsels of food he scavenges. I try to keep my floors a lot cleaner now!

He is also starting to mimic us with sounds. So far no words, but he enjoys when we emit the same yell he does. 

We took him camping a few weekends ago, and he loves it! He really seems to love being outside a lot! 

Many Faces of Tallet Reid

Tallet is sure going to have to get used to having a camera in his face, because I love taking pictures of him! I love his many faces, he's got such personality. These adorable pictures also help me to forget the fact that it just took us an hour to get him down for a nap.

3 Months Old!

This post is a few days late, I don't find myself at the computer that much anymore. I usually just go on Facebook, etc on my phone or iPod while nursing. I am doing a cookbook challenge though so that will give me more motivation to blog.

Anyways, Tallet Reid is three months old now and seems SO grown up already. He just started going in his exersaucer and bumbo chair and loves them both! Below are some pictures of him in his bumbo while I was sewing. One minute he was trying to eat his toys. The next minute he had his bumbo tray in pieces on the floor! I had a good laugh. 

He giggles a little bit now, smiles a lot, talks and loves to chew on our fingers. We swaddle him with one arm out now and he is able to sort of soothe himself by sucking on his fist. It is important to me that he learns to soothe himself because in 3 months he is moving up to his room for night and naps! 

He has his first cold right now and it is SO sad to hear him cough and be stuffed up.

I am loving being at home, being his mommy and watching him learn and grow. I thought I might get bored at home with a baby, but my days are still pretty full. Any my house is still pretty messy. I am sure I will get more efficient as time goes on!

Two Months Old!

Hard to believe 2 months has passed since we met our wonderful Mr. Tallet! I took some pictures of him on his 2 month birthday. As you can see, he was not impressed. I am not happy with any of them and I want to take more, but I still think they are incredibly cute. I love his grumpy face!

Tallet Hates Tall Fireman Paul

I absolutely love this vidoe of Tallet. I have watched it countless time. It is just so adorable. Eric was singing to him and he didn't like it. We would make him smile and then Eric would sing and he would cry over and over again. I think he was scared of the loudness and deepness of Eric's voice.

This video makes me realize that my boy is growing, and that he gets scared of things now. The other day I was nursing him and I thought the dogs got into the garbage so I shouted at them to get out of there, and he jumped and starting wailing right away. It's kinda cute how sensitive he is. Guess Eric and I cant scream at each other anymore! :p

It Gets Better

It is true what everyone tells you, it does get easier. I can actually imagine having another child now! It feels like we have figured things out a little better. I wouldn't say that we have a routine, but I am better at knowing how to calm Tallet's crying. I read the book "Happiest Baby On The Block' and it really taught me a lot about why newborns cry and how to calm it, and it really has worked for us. One major thing I have learnt about Tallet in the last few weeks is that he almost always cries when he is tired, and his tired cry is a lot more angry than his hungry cry.

Nighttime sleeping is a lot better, but not perfect. He usually just eats and goes back to sleep, but he still has the odd rough night where he just wants to be awake.

Breastfeeding is going better, the pain is a lot more bearable and we even have sometimes that doesn't hurt at all. It still isn't perfect or comfortable though. I am still working hard at getting him to latch properly which can be very frustrating. I got a prescription cream from the lactation consultant that helped a lot to heal things up. I must say the lactation consultants at HSC are awesome. SUPER friendly and very knowledgable. And they ooh and ahh over every single baby in there, which is fun to see.

Tallet is becoming more interactive and it easier to get a smile out of. He is starting to coo at us when we talk to him. He enjoys being on his play mat and it is fun to watch him bat his fists at the hanging toys. He loves when we sing to him.

I sure do love being a mommy. Definitely worth the wait, it is still so hard to believe that he is ours. 

Newborn Photos

Here is a sample of the newborn photos we got done when Tallet was 7 days old. This is not all of them but I don't want to share the ones we are using for thanks you cards and christmas!

Update!

I planned to post an update every week, but here I am with a  3.5 week old baby and only one post about it!

Life is so much busier than I had imagined. Having a baby is a lot of more work than I would have ever thought. Blogging is not my first choice when I have some free time.

Tallet is doing great, he is growing lots and changing almost every day. He does some big open mouthed smiles now that are super cute. Sometimes I think they are in response to me but other times I think they are a fluke.

We are cloth diapering a lot now, which is going good. Some of them seem to leak which is frustrating, but other times they don't. Still trying to figure out what works best with that.

My biggest struggle is still breastfeeding. It is extremely painful. I was in tears last night through pretty much a whole feeding. I am reading and reading and other women have this experience and they all say it goes away after a while. I am not sure how much longer I can do this for. I am taking advil and tylenol just to help reduce the pain a little bit. I dread feeding him, and I hate that I have to feel that way. It is supposed to be a bonding experience but I am just gritting my teeth and trying to make it through. I am going to see a lactation consultant tomorrow, and the doctor friday to make sure I don't have thrush. Both those appointment seem so far away and I don't know how I am going to make it to them. I want to breastfeed him SO badly because I know it is best for him and the most convenient, and the cheapest. But sometimes the idea of pumping and bottle feeding is WAY more appealing because of the pain. I guess that is a huge prayer request for me, that breastfeeding would be pain free.

I know I would be a lot less stressed out, and be able to deal with middle of the night feedings a lot easier if there was no pain.

Tallet also isn't sleeping well in his bassinet. I do not want a baby that sleeps with me, but the is the only time he gets good long sleeps. I have accidentally fallen asleep with him next to me in bed twice, and both times he slept for 5 hours at a time. It is not safe for him, and it is not great for my marriage for him to sleep with me. I wish there was some sort of alternative to the bassinet that he would be more comfortable in. Eric's cousin recommended a Rock 'n Play, but it appears they don't have those in Canada.

Tallet also is starting to sleep less and less during the day. He used to sleep for 2-3 hrs at a time in his bassinet during the day, and now it is an hour at most. I would like to get a comfortable sling so he can sleep with me, but my hands are still free to do what I want. I cannot sit around and hold him all day long for my own sanity.

I hope it doesn't seem like I am complaining, but these are my current struggles. I am so thankful to be able to experience these struggles, but it doesn't make them easier. I am afraid to talk to people about my struggles because I feel like they are just going to say "Well you wanted this for so long, so don't complain" or "Did you think it would be easy". Yes I wanted this, and no I didn't think it would be easy, but sometimes I would just like someone to be real with and to talk to. 

Home For A Week!

I have so much to write about and so little time to write about it. It is amazing how a tiny little person can take up so much of your time!

The hospital stay was great. Our first night our nurse was very nice, but she was not very helpful with breastfeeding. They had to check his blood sugar a few times because it was on the low end. The nurse would let me try to get him to latch for a few minutes, and then get us to feed him formula. I barely slept that night, mostly because he was swaddled and I kept worrying about the blanket being over his mouth.

It was hard for me to sit up in bed, and I was still hooked up to IV and urinary catheter so getting out of bed wasn't an option. Eric had to get up and get him for me every time.

We had a lots of visitors in the hospital, it was nice and helped to pass the time. Every nurse I had after the first was was EXTREMELY helpful with breastfeeding. The second nurse I had got Tallet to latch right away, and every time after that.

Midway through the second day I got unhooked from everything. It was SO nice to be free!

Our second night was a lot smoother, still didn't get a tonne of sleep but more than the first night. I had a student nurse the third day, and in the morning she told me if everything went good we could go home that day. I was surprised because I assumed that I would have to stay 3 days with a c-section.

At around 4, after Tallet had a 45 minute feeding we got to go home. It was scary taking all the responsibility home. We made a quick stop at Babies R Us to get a nursing pillow and some no-scratch mittens. Tallet slept all the way home!

Our first night at home was rough. I had assumed I would get at least a couple hours of sleep, but I didn't get any. All Tallet wanted to do was nurse, he barely slept. They say the "cluster feeding" is supposed to happen the second night, but he saved it until the first. I wished we had stayed in the hospital. I wanted to call my mom. I didn't know what to do and I felt overwhelmed and inadequate.

We have been home for a week now today, and things are going alright. It is still hard to believe that this sweet little boy is ours, but at the same time it feels like he fits right in.

We have had a lot of visitors bringing food and gifts. The support has been great, but sometimes it makes it difficult when I am struggling to feed him under a cover. We have had a few good nights and a few rough nights. We are still trying to figure everything out.

Breastfeeding is going alright, but not as good as I could hope. It often takes me a while to get him to latch on properly, we often have 10-20 minute periods of "latch, suck 3 times, cry, repeat" which are frustrating and discouraging for me. It feels like I am not doing something properly. And then sometimes he will only eat for 5 minutes then fall asleep. It is especially bad at night when I just want him to have a good, big meal so he will sleep. Sometimes I think switching to bottle-feeding would be SO much easier, and I would just pump. But in the long run that would be a lot more work. And I know I am only 1 week into it, and they say it takes 4-6 weeks to establish breastfeeding, so I will stick it out. I am looking forward to the day it is easy and pain-free!

Tallet is learning to sleep in his bassinet, which can also be a challenge. Sometimes he will sleep really well in there for several hours, and sometimes he wants nothing to do with it. Again this is something that is frustrating for me, because I very much want a baby that is able to sleep on his own. And there is SO much advice out there, it is hard to know what is the right thing to do.

He goes through ALOT of diapers. He will not sleep or eat with a dirty diaper (I don't blame him at all), and sometimes it seems like he dirties one right after we change one. We are using cloth diapers, but only have 8 that fit him so we go through them pretty fast. All the other ones I have are too big and it leaks through them, and these are newborn sizes! I didn't realize I would have such a tiny baby. So half the time we are using pampers, but we really like our cloth diapers!

It has been a long week, and I am still very tired, but it has been a dream come true week! I am so incredibly thankful that God has give us Tallet. He is so much sweeter and so much cuter than we could have ever imagined and we are totally in love with him. We waited for so many years for him, and he is perfect.  God is so good.

Tallet's Birth Story - Part 3 - Recovery

Shortly after meeting my little boy, I got to try to feed him. It didn't turn out so well, but I was glad we got to try. Eric made lots of phone calls, most of which were tearful. It was adorable. He hates when I bring it up. 

I was very groggy, but I felt good. I felt MUCH better than when I went in for surgery. I was no longer overheated, and the painful contractions were gone. 

I was wheeled into another recovery room where I stayed for 5 hours. Tallet was with me for the first little bit. I got to try to feed him again. Eric took some pictures to show our families and he went for lunch with everyone while I recovered.

I was exhausted, not sure if it was from the surgery or labor or no sleep for two nights. Probably a combination of everything. I got to try to feed Tallet again, but it wasn't good either. 

At 2:30 they took him to the nursery to have something to eat and to get bathed while I continued to recover. At 4 the nurse helped me wash up and took out a few IVs. I got to brush my hair, which was nice. They said I was recovering really well. My doctor popped in to say hi and to tell me that she was not as worried about me as the anesthesiologist was, but they were going to keep a really close eye on me for the next day. 

They finally wheeled me to my room at 5 where my mom, step dad and brother were waiting with Eric and Tallet. They stayed for a little bit, but then Tallet had to go get weighed and his blood sugar taken. 

Eric's family came in after mine left, and when Tallet got back to the room Eloa got to hold him for a little bit, but then it was time for skin to skin time with me. 

I was still extremely tired, but it is the most amazing and surreal experience to be cuddling with a little boy you waiting and prayed so long for. He had arrived safely and is healthy. God is so good and has blessed us with this beautiful miracle. 

When I reflect back on this labor, I am surprisingly not disappointed about having a c-section. I thought I would be totally crushed if I ended up having to get one. But with all the events leading up to it, I know it was the right decision for us. If I am disappointed in anything, it is that I got that stinkin' infection that screwed up everything. I wish I didn't have to do that, but I don't know how I could have prevented it. I think I gave it my best try at having a natural, drug free birth. I feel like I had the really intense contractions for a longer period of time than normal. It was like I was in the transition phase of labor, supposed to last 1-2 hours, for 12 hours. I hope that if we are blessed with another baby, I can try an all natural birth again and my body will co-operate a bit better!

Tallet's Birth Story - Part 2 - The Hospital

Walking to the delivery room was a challenge. I had several contractions along the way that caused me to stop and grip onto something to stay standing. All I wanted to do was lay down.

Everything after that is kind of a blur and it is hard to remember when every event happened but I will try.

I layed in the bed for a while, trying to relax and breath through the contractions. The nurses told me my pain medication options and I said I didn't want anything. The offered the tub and the shower to me, so after a while I decided to try out the shower.

Getting to the shower was a chore because any movement triggered another contractions and it was so hard to do anything while having one. The shower felt great and I stayed in there for probably 45 minutes. I used the washroom right after and had several contractions while I was doing that. It was very uncomfortable.

I got checked and was only 4 cm dilated. I was disappointed because my contractions were so intense I figure something should have been progressing faster than than.

When we were reading and preparing for labor, I remember looking forward to having Eric rub my back during contractions. But once I was having them back rubs did not feel good, so Eric couldn't really do a lot to help me.

People had told me that in-between contractions you get a break and have no pain. I did not experience that. The pained dulled between contractions, but did not go away. The nurses remarked how they couldn't believe how intense my contractions were naturally, that they only usually see contractions like that with someone on the oxytocin drip.

I was very thirsty the whole time and drank ALOT of water. The nurses said I was doing a good job handing the contractions because I was breathing through them and a lot of people hold their breath. This is probably part of the reason everything is a bit of a blur, because I was so concentrated on breathing through the pain.

My heart rate was high and the nurse was very concerned and wanted to put an IV in. I would have liked to avoid that, but I wasn't going to be stupid about refusing something I needed. It took them 5 tries and 3 different nurses to get an IV in.

I don't really remember the order of things after that. But my blood pressure was high, temperature was climbing and turned into a fever and they put me on the monitors with straps because they were concerned about the babies heart rate during contractions. I remember taking a pill for my blood pressure and tylenol for my fever, neither of them helped.

The next time I was check was like 3 hours after the first time and I was still only 4-5 cm dilated and my cervix was starting to swell.

At some point I had a urinary catheter inserted and an internal monitor placed on the baby. It took 4 or 5 people to get my urinary catheter in, and a couple to place the monitor properly. I also had blood taken because they were concerned about an infection.

I remember feeling helpless while all these things were being done because I didn't have a clear mind to ask questions about them, I was so focused on breathing through and handling the contractions that remained 1-2 minutes apart.

I did not want to use any drugs for this labor, but after not progressing much and my cervix swelling and some prodding from the nurses I dedided to let them give me some fentanyl. I hoped it would help me relax through the contractions a bit more so my body could relax and my cervix could dilate further. The drugs took the edge off the pain slightly, but barely did anything.

Shortly after all these interventions I was moved into the high risk delivery room. The nurse in there was kind of mean and asked me multiple times why I didn't want an epidural. Every time she would give me more fentanyl she would try to convince me to have one, but I kept refusing because I still wanted to try my best to deal with the pain.

I was checked again and I was 7 cm. I was excited I had moved along a bit more, so I continued to deal with the contractions for another 4 hours. I remember Eric reading to me for a while, I don't think he knew what else to do. It did help me to relax.

I was checked again around 8 am and I was still 7 cm and my cervix was still swollen. I was so discouraged and disappointed that I hadn't progressed at all in 4 hours of intense contractions. The nurses and doctors that came to check in on me were already talking about C-sections which I still really wanted to avoid.

At some point I was told I had an infection and they gave me IV antibiotics.

My doctor was on call that morning, and I was told she would come to see me soon. My nurse was trying to convince me to have and epidural, and I was starting to consider it. I heard the nurses talking in their side room that my only chance of a vaginal delivery was to have an epidural. With MUCH hesitance I decided to go for it. Their reasoning was that it would help me relax and hopefully help my dilate. I told the nurses I wanted it, and they said my doctor was coming soon and I could talk about it with her.

It was such a relief to see my doctor when she came. It just calmed me down a lot. She said we were heading in the direction of a c section. When she checked me she said that the baby was facing the wrong way, which could be a reason I was not progressing because baby's head was not fitting into my pelvis properly enough to dilate me. Contractions were mostly painful in the lower half of my abdomen and my pelvis. I felt like I had to take a gigantic crap. The nurse tried to tell me it was the baby's head, but I told her I was POSITIVE I had to go to the washroom. She said when the dr checked me she would check for stool, and sure enough when she did check there was nothing there. I am sure they hear that all the time.

Anyways, my options were c-section or to try some oxytocin to make the contractions strong so I could dilate. I could not imagine them any stronger or being able to handle them, so I said I didn't want to do that without an epidural.

I waited for the anesthesiolgist to come talk to me about my epidural. As soon as I decided to go of the epidural, I was VERY impatient about getting it and it seemed like it took forever for him to get there.

When he arrived the news was not what I expected. He informed me that while an epidural is a low risk procedure, I was at high risk because I had an infection. He refused to do an epidural for me and said I was at risk for ending up in the ICU because of the infection I had. If I needed a c-section, it would have to be under general anaesthesia.

This scared me and made me really worried about my own health. My doctor came back in and said that we had to decide between a c-section and trying a bit longer with some oxytocin. She said baby was still doing well and that is why we could still try for a vaginal birth, but because of how I was doing she highly recommended going for the c-section.

At this point I was 12 hours into contractions that were 1-2 minutes apart, I had an infection, pretty much every vital sign was elevated, it was a no brainer to go for the c-section. Eric was in charge of making decisions for me, and even he was ready for me to have a c-section. It took us about 2 minutes of talking about it to say yes.

In 20 minutes I was in the surgery room. I was laying there just hoping they would put me under already so the pain could go away. Eric was not aloud to be in the room because I was under a general anesthesia, meaning I was right out.

I woke up feeling MUCH better, despite the surgical pain, to Eric tearfully telling me we has a little boy who weighed 7 lbs 9 oz. Minutes later I got to see him, and he was perfect.

**I will continue about recovery from surgery another day!**

Tallet's Birth Story - Part 1 - Before The Hospital

**This is a real birth story, so if you don't want all the dirty details, stop reading now**

Everything started with my prenatal appointment on Thursday. We packed and planned to stay the night in the city even by dropping my dogs off at my aunties. There was a craft sale on Friday I really want to go to. And I was hoping I would go into labor.

My blood pressure was still high at my appointment, so my Doctor recommended to do an internal check and if I was dilated enough she said we could do a membrane sweep. I wanted to avoid being induced in any sort of way, but I figured this was the most natural way and if it worked that would be great. I was 3 cm dilated and she did do membrane sweep and said there was a "very good possibility" that it would get things going.

My appointment was at 12:40, and because we had planned to stay the night in the city we had nothing else to do for the rest of the day but wait around. Eric need to get jeans so we decided to go to the mall and walk around hoping it would get things going. I did feel crampy already, but wasn't sure if it was because of having my membranes stripped or because something was starting.

We walked around the mall for a while, and then I decided I should probably walk a bit more so we went to Walmart. I went to the washroom in Walmart and learn that I had definitely had the bloody show/ lost my mucous plug. We walked around Walmart for a while and I figured I was having contractions but wasn't sure. I was tired go walking and hungry so we decided to go to my cousin Jo's where we planned to stay the night and order pizza. On the drive there I knew for sure I was having contractions, but they were very mild.

I sat on the couch and knit all evening, contracting every 6-10 minutes, sometimes longer. I thought for sure we would have to go to the hospital in the middle of the night. I didn't sleep a whole lot that night, and contractions stayed 6-10 minutes apart all night. I was scared to sleep because I didn't want labor to stop like it had before!

I decided to go to the Scattered Seeds craft sale after all, hoping that all that walking would get things out. We walked there for about an hour, I didn't find a whole lot that I wanted to buy.

We decided to go to the mall to grab some lunch from the food court, it was PACKED there and I ran into a couple of my aunties so we had lunch together. One of my aunties offered that we could go to her place to hang out for the afternoon. We walked around the mall, I bought a brush because I had forgotten mine and I wanted one for the hospital. Contractions seemed to get a bit stronger but nothing too close together.

I was starting to get kind frustrated and discouraged at this point. I had been having contractions for nearly a full day, and no progress (this seemed to be the song of my whole labor). We decided to go to my aunties to hang out. We went for a short walk there and then I napped for over 2 hours. I am SO glad I did!

We had an awesome supper at Moxie's, after which we planned to go to the mall to walk around some more and go see a movie. After our delicious supper at Moxies' I got up to leave and felt a few small gushed. I looked at Eric and told him I thought my water broke, and he didn't quite believe me. I didn't really believe it myself!

I went to the bathroom to check, and my pad I had on was quite wet but I wasn't sure if it was still the mucous plug or water. We went to the mall to walk and my contractions were a solid 4 minutes apart. I had a couple more gushes and figured we should probably head to the hospital now!

We got to St. B and when I got out of the car I had a huge gush of water, soaked my pad and my pants. I knew this was it!

It took some time to find the right place to get admitted, and we got admitted and I got checked. It was quite disappointed to hear that I was still only 3 cm dilates. The nurse told me she couldn't admit me yet and wanted me to walk around for an hour. I had a few very strong contractions while I was there.

I tried to walk around, but I had contractions that were so strong and so close together I could hardly move. We found the early labor lounge and I used the washroom and had contractions that were about 1.5-2 minutes apart with next to no break in-between. Eric tried to convince me to walk again, so we tried. I got a few steps out of the lounge and decided I couldn't do it. I couldn't walk more than 10 feet in-between contractions so I decided to wait out the hour in the lounge. It was awful having those contractions in a chair.

I waited out the hour in there, and asked Eric to go see if I could get checked again. They didn't even bother checking me, I got taken into a labor and delivery room right away.

**Time for bed today! I will post part two another day!**

Tallet Reid

Tallet Reid was born on October 20th at 10:51 am. 

He was 7lbs 9 ozs and 22 inches long. 

He is such a joy and we are totally head over heels for him. 

Many more details about his labor and delivery to come.